Funny

"The gods too are fond of a joke."

"Don't use cannon to kill musquito."

"V-Day…if you need this one day in a year to show everyone else you truly care for “your loved one” I think it’s quite stupid. I hate this commercialism. It’s all artificial, and has nothing to do with real love."

"Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy."

"And now," Eric yelled into his mircophone, "we're going to sing a new song-one we just wrote. This one's for my girlfriend. We've been going out for three weeks, and, damn, our love is true. We're gonna be together forever, baby. This one's called 'Bang You Like a Drum."

"I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed."

"Do not tell jokes that ain’t funny."

"Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead."

"A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff."

"Eat to live, don't live to eat."

"Bob Marley isn't my name. I don't even know my name yet."

"Fashion is made to become unfashionable."