"I'm smart and I can be really funny and interesting and I can go toe-to-toe with anybody in a conversation."

"As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself, the other for helping others."

"Poor empty pants with nobody inside them."

"From there to here, from here to there, funny things are everywhere!"

"Make-up can only make you look pretty on the outside but it doesn't help if your ugly on the inside. Unless you eat the make-up."

"I think that I'm so psychotic and so mentally ill that if I could tap into that I could do something really interesting."