Humour

"A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff."

"If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?"

"It's important in life if you don't give a shit. It can help you a lot."

"Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively."

"May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house."

"It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on."

"I've never owned a telescope, but it's something I'm thinking of looking into."

"A fit, healthy body—that is the best fashion statement"

"Never wrestle with pigs. You both get dirty and the pig likes it."

"A cat will blink when struck with a hammer."

"In heaven, all the interesting people are missing."

"Who said nights were for sleep?"